


Bothered and Bewildered

by Magnetism_bind



Category: Black Sails
Genre: Feelings Realization, Kissing, Love Confessions, M/M, Missing Scene, Past Relationship(s), all the feelings, clueless!Silver, mentions of thomas hamilton - Freeform, series three fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-11
Updated: 2019-06-11
Packaged: 2020-04-24 11:55:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,765
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19172773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Magnetism_bind/pseuds/Magnetism_bind
Summary: Sometimes Silver is a tad clueless.





	Bothered and Bewildered

 

The flame in the lantern is burning low, the bottle growing even emptier. Silver watches Flint across from him, fingers still toying with his rings and glancing at Silver like he regrets the confession that just came forth from his lips.

 Silver wants to dispel that uncertainty. Surely Flint knows he can trust him? He’d thought that was the whole purpose in telling the story.

“Thank you,” he begins and Flint’s gaze settles on him immediately. “For telling me your story. I appreciate what that must have taken for you to do so.”

Flint gives a mirthless chuckle. “Do you?”

“Well, not completely.” Silver admits, for he cannot, even now that he and Flint can sit here like this, with some measure of trust between them, fathom the thought of telling Flint about his own past. That is a void best left unexplored. “But I can imagine.”

“Right.” Flint says, and then, oddly, “You understand why I’ve told you this _now_ , then. And not before?”

There’s a questioning tone to his voice and Silver wants to calm that as much as the fidgeting of his fingers. “Yes.”

“You do?”

“You trust me.” Silver says simply.

Flint stares at him and blinks. “Well, yes. I wouldn’t have told you any of that if I didn’t hold you in a degree of trust.” He pauses, and then, “But you did understand the true nature of my relationship with Thomas.”

“Yes.”

“It wasn’t just friendship,” Flint presses home, “Not solely that, at any rate.”

“Yes.” Silver says again, looking at him puzzled. He _knows_ about men fucking. Flint doesn’t have to explain that to him. He’s been in brothels and he’s seen how people live, and feel, and he knows this, none of what Flint is adding here is necessary, so why is he telling him this again.

“We-“ Flint starts.

“You fucked each other.” Silver says quickly. He doesn’t know why it’s necessary for him to say this and not Flint, but it is and he blurts it out before Flint can. The word leaves a heated weight upon his tongue.

Flint looks surprised, but nods. “Yes.” He takes a hefty swallow, and wipes his mouth. “You didn’t seem surprised, frankly.”

“That’s.” Silver pauses, “Well, to be honest, it explains a great deal about you.”

Flint’s expression sharpens and Silver hurries to explain before he can grow offended. “What I mean is…I knew there was something that had caused you to pursue this course, and finding it was because you lost someone like Thomas…well, that explains it.”

“Ah.” Flint says. His thumb strokes the bottleneck absently as he looks at Silver. “So it doesn’t lessen me in your opinion to know I fuck men.” He says the words lightly, almost carelessly.

Silver smiles in spite of himself. “If that were an issue I doubt I would still be here.”

“Mhm.” Flint’s teeth worry at his lower lip. His gaze slides over Silver again and away again, like there’s still something he’s holding back from speaking aloud. But what can he be holding back at this point? What secrets can he still have?

“Is there something else you wish to say?” Silver says, somewhat a loss.

“Only that…” Flint hesitates yet again, hand gripping the bottle tightly. “I would say that…” He sighs and tips the bottle back. “We should get back to the camp and get some sleep.”

Silver blinks. That’s not what he had been expecting Flint to say, even though he has no clear notion of what he did expect. He follows him back to the camp and settles down upon his bed with a curious disappointment in his chest.

 

*  *  *

 

Silver wakes in the night as sharply as if someone had prodded him in the side with a dagger.

_Flint._

He thinks of all the looks bestowed upon him. The way Flint has with him. The small gifts of his smile when no one else is looking. The sheer fact that he told Silver that story. Yes, it was due to trust, but there was something more there. Silver’s certain of that. The question is, what?

Is it possible that he’s missed something? That Flint was doing that…that he had told this story to Silver because of how he felt?

Silver rolls over to stare at the sleeping figure on the other side of the hut. “Flint.”

There’s no response. Silver hesitates. He looks back up at the roof, but he can’t lie still, he can’t sleep. This can’t wait till morning. Not now that he’s thought about it, not that the idea is _there,_ inside his mind.

“Flint.” He whispers again.

Still no response.

With a sigh, Silver eases out of bed and reaches for his crutch. He makes his way over to Flint’s pallet and sinks down beside him.

“Flint.”

Flint stirs faintly, but doesn’t rouse himself. Silver reaches over and prods him in the back with his forefinger. Still nothing. Silver does it again, and then a third time.

Only for him to be shoved down flat upon his back, a broad arm pressed across his throat and a knife to his belly. Silver stares up at Flint wide-eyed.

Flint stares back down at him. “Why?” He questions, still holding on to Silver as though he doesn’t know he’s doing it.

Silver’s aware of his weight, the feeling of Flint’s body pressed against him. It’s not even all of Flint leaning into him, and yet he thinks of that, Flint straddling him, Flint lying atop him, and he draws in a quick breath.

Flint looks down and releases him immediately. He sits back, setting the knife down. “What the devil are you doing?”

“Earlier when we were speaking,” Silver starts. He stares at Flint, is now unbearably focused on all the aspects of Flint that before he had catalogued and set aside. The pointedly short looks when they’d first met. The guarded yet hopeful look in Flint’s eyes these days. The way his hands had touched Silver when he had tended him after losing his leg. The way his mouth seems to seek something from Silver, even when it’s silent.

“What?” Flint says bluntly. “If you have nothing more to say, I would prefer to go back to sleep.”

Silver swallows. “I know it may seem an absurd question to ask but were you….flirting with me?”

 _Have you been flirting with me all along?_ Would be a more accurate question, he thinks.

Flint simply stares at him.

Silver waits for him to deny it, to tell him he’s a fool, that he’s imagining things, that all of this has been simply Flint’s past and not his present. That he doesn’t look at Silver’s mouth and _want._

Instead Flint simply says, “I’m weary now. We can…discuss this in the morning.” He turns and lies down again, his back to Silver.

Silver just stares at him in amazement. “How can you sleep now?” That wasn’t a denial! That was…

“Because I’ve had a long time to get used to the nature of my feelings.” Flint says quietly.

“But…I haven’t.” Silver says helplessly. This is all new to him. The idea that Flint might possibly care for him is too much. He can’t just sit there and wait all night, he will go mad. “So I was right? You were saying that you might…have feelings for me? That you might want to-”

Flint swears under his breath. He sits up, balancing himself on his elbow as he looks at Silver carefully. “I didn’t tell you any of that to cause you turmoil. I simply thought you should know.”

“How could you not have told me before!” Silver hisses. “How long have you been thinking of this?” He’s not even sure what he means by _this,_ but Flint’s eyes drop to his mouth, and it’s as though he punched Silver straight in the gut. He’s right, he has to be right here.

To his surprise Flint just chuckles and sighs. “I take it back. I am no longer attracted to you.”

“What?” Silver demands. “Why?”

“You talk too much.” Flint tells him blandly.

“That’s unfair! I still need to think of all of this. As I told you, it’s new.”

“You should have thought of that before you opened your mouth.” Flint tells him, weariness apparent in every word.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Silver’s voice grows heated, and then. “So you were thinking of my mouth?”

“For fuck’s _sake_.” Flint grits out.

He reaches for Silver, his palm spreading wide over the back of his neck. Silver trembles from the feeling of his hand. It’s just Flint’s hand but it’s so much more in one simple gesture.

He looks straight into Flint’s eyes as Flint begins to speak.

“I was drawn to you before I wanted to be. I’ve wanted you for some time now. I feel…” His thumb presses warmly into Silver’s neck. “As though you were a part of me that I hadn’t even known I was missing.”

Flint’s gaze bores into Silver. “Now. Is that enough for you?” His other hand goes to Silver’s crotch. “Or do you need to hear how I hunger to touch you? That I dream of fucking you?”

Silver swallows and Flint’s grip tightens just a fraction.

“All of that is true.” Flint says softly. “You ask why I held back? Why I didn’t tell you until now. Because I didn’t know what you would say in response.”

He’s still looking at Silver with that hope in his eyes. And now Silver understands what he failed to do before.

“I want to say, surely you know what is in my heart.” He begins. “But how could you know when I barely understood it myself. I find it difficult to look back at a time when I did not care for you, or desire you, even at the beginning when you most definitely wanted to kill me and even now-”

Flint utters a groan and drags him closer. “Will you not shut up?” He demands. “Have I truly no recourse left but this?”

With that he crushes Silver’s mouth to his and for a moment Silver is frozen. He almost can’t believe this kiss is real. Is he simply still asleep and dreaming? Is Flint’s mouth truly touching his? And then Flint groans again, and Silver knows it is real. He reaches for Flint, gripping his shirt with both hands as he kisses Flint back with all the strength that he possesses.

Neither of them get any more sleep that night.


End file.
